Archive for September, 2008
Can you spend one full day in complete silence?…
On September 30, 2008 in Thoughts in the evening...
Tuesday is the order of the night and I am feeling good. I have to start off by stating a very real and exciting fact: I had a very happy day today. Even more than happy, I would say I was wonderfully present at each activity and not worrying about what else I could be doing, what I needed to do tomorrow or dwelling on the few setbacks that occurred throughout the day.
It was a good morning. I woke up at 5:30am to play golf with a couple of good friends. I had to get to work so we only played 9 holes but I had a great time. I had Bob Marley blasting in the car on the way there, a big grin on my face and I was singing ”One Love” at the top of my lungs, one of my dad’s favorite songs. He was a big reggae fan. We even rented golf carts and since it had rained yesterday, there was big puddles all ovet the place and I was running that thing like a 4 wheeler! I got to see the sunrise in all it’s splendor and had a million laughs all before 9am, it was beautiful. Work was good too, we got a lot done and although I had to stay late to finish a few extra things, it was fine, this was going to be a grat day and nothing was going to stand in my way. One thing that has been going around in my head lately is that each day I have a choice of having a good, adventurous and unique day or a routine, boring and frustrating one. Thoreau had said that the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. Whether or not that’s true is not even worth discussing. What is worth talking about is making sure we don’t wind up there. I fully accept the challenge of making life extraordinary and I hope you do too 
Tonight’s question is a strange one I know, but it amazes me how rare it is to actually spend a full day in silence. I have tried it a few times and even attempted it with a few friends but it wasn’t easy and I can’t even remember the last time I succeeded. It’s interesting to experience what happens when you take verbal communication out of the picture for a bit. I know by now you must think I am completely bonkers but trust me, it’s worth trying, you will not be dissapointed.
Hope you’re having a gorgeous evening and I will see you in the morning.
much love
~adrian
p.s. Tonight’s pics are a potpurri of different times in my dad’s life. That baby in one of the pics is my sister Adriana.
Book of Questions #82…
On September 29, 2008 in Thoughts in the evening...
Monday evening it is then. Not a bad Monday at all if I must admit. I got to hang out with a good friend for coffee, had a good days work, a delicious lunch involving a chicken panini and now I am sitting with my mom enjoying some peaceful moments and good conversation. This is a good way to start the week
The day started out with blue skies and sunshine as far as the eye can see but got a little bit cloudy towards the evening. I don’t know why I always feel compelled to let you know the weather here in NYC but I feel like it’s a must if I’m going to invite you into my daily life. Just think of me as your own private NYC weatherman. lol!
So here we are once again with another question:
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Are you a good listener?
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My answer:
I fancy myself quite the good listener. I guess it stems from my borderline obsession with asking questions. Okay I am obsessed! lol! I genuinely like to hear people’s stories, thoughts and life experiences. I have always been that way even as a young kid. I guess it was a way to skip the pleasantries and get straight into the good stuff. If you ever meet me in person you will quickly come to the realization that I suck at small talk. And to be quite honest, I am quite proud of that. I know, everybody’s got it together on the surface, is super confident, unmoved by the challenges of the day but we know better than that. The reality I find when we open up to each other is that everyone is fighting to find their calling, figure out how best to live their day, searching for love, scared some days and confident others, has a million things going on in their minds at any given time. This is the truth about us as humans and what makes a good friend a good friend, a loving spouse a loving spouse, a parent a parent, a sibling a sibling is that they know our little quirks, doubts and hangups and still accept us completely. And to be quite honest, this is the stuff that makes us interesting. At least that’s my dos centavos.
The pic I am sharing tonight is a pic of my dad with his parents. He was probably around 17 years old when they took that pic.
have a beautiful night everyone
much love
~adrian
Can you drive a stick shift?…
On September 28, 2008 in Thoughts in the evening...
It’s Sunday night, the crickets are chirping or singing or cricketing, well, whatever it is they do and it’s peaceful and refreshing. It was a beautifully quiet day, one full of many hugs, good laughs and much reflection. Not a bad way to spend a Sunday at all.
We are here with my sis and mom going through some old pictures of the family and amazed at how quick time goes by. It’s funny because when you’re a kid, all you hope for is for time to scoot along as quickly as possible and as you get older, you wish there was a way to apply some brakes to life. Slow down, please! lol! But in the end, time goes by at the same rate and the best thing we can do is be as imagineative as possible with how we spend it and not give this precious commodity over to thoughts, worries or activities that don’t merit it’s value. We hear it all the time about how precious time is and how we ought not waste it but the truth is, and I speak to myself first and foremost, what am I doing to make my life unique and not epxend my energies on fruitless ventures and activities. If you can’t remember one week from the next, and it all seems like one big endless wheel with no time to breathe, it’s time to change some things. Trust me, nobody is going to flinch if you slow down a bit to see what’s around you. Dare to make the day unique, you’ll never regret it.
So tonight’s question is a practical one and yet a fun one: Can you drive a stick shift? I myself love to drive stick shift cars and I am happy that I presently own a stick shift. My last two vehicles weren’t and I missed it dearly. There’s just something about the driving a manual transmission that makes it more fun and ejoyable, at least for me.
Hope you have a beautiful night and the pic I am sharing tonight is one from my parent’s wedding in 1963. I love this pic.
much love
~adrian
p.s. We have a new tattoo pic from Alessandra, check it out here. Remember if you have any pics for any of the photo challenges that we have done in the past, you can always send them in, and I will def post them.
Peaceful Impromptu Sunday…
On September 28, 2008 in Peaceful Sunday
Good Sunday morning to all. It is a peaceful morning indeed here out in Long Island, NY. The day is gray and the air is still drizzly. A perfect way to wake up. It’s quiet as quiet can be and I look out into a huge green backyard full of trees and rain covered grass. Tranquility seems to be the order of the day.
And for this gray and quiet morning I have the perfect piece of music to share with you. I was listening to it yesterday in the car and couldn’t believe I had never shared this piece by Chopin with you. As you know I am a huge Chopin fan and one of his most beautiful pieces was the Fantasy Impromptu in C# minor. I had learned this piece in college but never to a performance level and it is just stunning. It starts off rumbling in the left hand and then followed by a rather quick, yet light melody above it. Then in the middle section, one of the most beautiful melodies my ears have ever heard emerges. This is a piece that deserves closed eyes and time for it to sink in. There was a little blurb on the side of the Youtube video that Chopin apparently hated this piece when he composed it when he was 24. I can’t imagine that but even if it was true, I am glad it made it’s way to the 21st century for us to be able to enjoy and I hope you do. Without further ado, I share with you the Fantasy Impromptu
Have a perfect morning my friends and I will see you tonight
much love
~adrian
Have you ever gone kayaking?…
On September 27, 2008 in Thoughts in the evening...
Good Saturday evening sweet friends. It’s been a rainy day here in NYC all day but I am not complaining in the least. It was a perfect way for the city to slow down a bit and just enjoy the drizzle. It continues to rain ever so slightly and seems like the rain will accompany our slumber tonight which is aokay with me
I hope your weekend is going along smoothly so far. I had a much better day today and enjoyed a big lunch with a good friend of mine and then headed right home to lazy out on the couch and put on a movie. It was utter perfection and the perfect way to spend this afternoon. It was just what I needed. No responsibilities, no to-do lists and nowhere to be, haven’t had one of those afternoons in quite some time and I stand a grateful man for it. I have since arrived here in Long Island at my folks house to spend have dinner with my mom and spend some time together. She’s doing well and I am continuously in awe of her strength as a person. With my sisters we’re always reflecting upon how amazing she is and her ability to deal with the challenges of this life. For as much as I talk about my pops and how great a dad he was, I couldn’t of hand picked a better mom either And yes, I do tell her this constantly. lol!
So tonight’s question is a simple one, but one that carries a lot of memories for me: Have you ever gone kayaking? My dad loved to kayak and we went often. One of my most memorable trips with him was kayaking around the island of Manhattan. It takes all day and although he did it over 7 times, I was lucky enough to go with him one of those times. We were so proud when we finished and soaked since it had started to rain when we were coming back down the Hudson River. Good times. And yes, that’s me and my dad in the pics! I think the orange bandana really works. lol!
Well, have a beautiful night and I will see you all in the morning with a great piece to share on Peaceful Sunday
much love
~adrian
P.S. We are about half way through the ‘Always on My Mind’ video but we still need more clips! Click here to see which lines are left and send your clip in, you are going to love how it’s turning out and I can’t wait to show it to all of you. So c’mon, get a little silly and send in a clip, you’ll want to be a part of this one, scouts honor 
Little pieces come together…
On September 26, 2008 in Thoughts in the evening...
I was never much of a pack rat growing up but I did have certain things that I enjoyed keeping and among those things were handwritten letters. For some strange reason, I always found the idea of letter writing fascinating and the thought that you could write some ‘code’ on the face of an envelope, pop it in a metal box on a corner and it would arrive safely to someone that you chose was beyond my comprehension. It was with this fascination that I became quite an avid letter writer and enjoyed correspondence with numerous people, one of which was my dad whenever I was away for the summer or in Argentina.
When I was a teenager, I would have files for everyone that I wrote letters to and so I still have, to this day, dozens of files and hundreds of handwritten letters from when I was younger. Like I said, I am not one to hold on to things, but this is one thing I am glad I kept. And so, with the foundation to this story laid out, tonight I share with you a few memories that were in my dad’s file
When he would write any of his children, especially on our birthday’s, you could always count on some elaborate sketch with your name smack in the middle of it. It was always a treat and I still remember the feeling when we would get a card or letter from him. As for his letter writing, my dad was one of those individuals who would say the right thing to make you cry, in a good way of course. I don’t know how he did it, but you would always end up tearing up by the end of the letter. One of the quirkiest aspects of my pop was that, he gave you perfect, bullseye advice every single time you asked him for it, but he was stubborn as a mule when it came to taking it. lol! A lot of these letters were written to me during difficult times in my life and he always said the right thing and I was fortunate enough to realize at an early age that we cannot live this life only in our own wisdom and experiences but need to rely on the wisdom and experience of those who know more, have lived more and have grown more. He was indeed a wise man and although I benefited greatly from that, sometimes I wish he would have asked for help a little bit more.
And finally, the picture below is from when I was baptized. I was 18 years old, man where do the years go? To his right is his mom and to my left is my mom.
So that’s it for tonight. I am off to have dinner with some friends and enjoy some fresh air. I continually thank each and every one of you for all your messages, prayers and love. I read each and every word that is sent to me and know that your words are always received with much love.
have an unbelievably beautiful night and I will do the same
much love
~adrian
One day at a time….
On September 25, 2008 in Thoughts in the evening...
The evening is settling in and with almost impeccable timing and the rain has begun. There is a wonderful breeze blowing through the room and I am in a quiet and peaceful moment right now. My sis and mom just left my apartment and made their way back to my folks house to prepare some dinner and spend some time together. I am finishing some things up here and will join them later on. In case you haven’t noticed from my previous writings, we eat quite late in my family and it’s uncommon to have dinner at 9 or even 10pm. We were never a 6pm, everyone at the table kind of family
One of the things things I have been experiencing over the past few days is this sense of elongated time. It’s a strange feeling since usually my days consist of not having enough time or more accurately, not feeling like I have enough time. We all get the same 24 hours, it’s just how we choose to spend it that makes the difference. So here I am with more time than I know what to do with since everything seems quite unimportant at the moment in comparison to what’s going on inside my heart and with my family. I think back to just a few weeks ago and remember all the things that “couldn’t wait” and “had to be done” and I realize that anything and everything can move to the back burner or become non-existent at all in just a few moments. What I like about this lesson is that it’s okay to not make everything so dramatic and so ‘end all be all’ all the time. I’m not saying to treat everything in this life as frivolous as if ultimately it doesn’t mean anything, what I am talking about is placing things in their proper order of importance, which I realize more and more, I am quite poor at doing. And so I choose to thank my father for another lesson learned, even one that he would have admitted, he himself never quite learned.
Keep your mind on good things, learn lesson when they presents themselves, realize that you’re not alone in trying to figure out this crazy ride and things should roll along quite smoothly. And talk to your neighbor, you probably have a lot more in common than you think
much love my sweet sweet friends
~adrian
p.s. These are two of my guitars that my father hand painted. He was a great at pinstriping and I’ll share some of his other work in the following days.
And so here I find myself…
On September 24, 2008 in Thoughts in the evening...
These moments continue to feel like a dream, those times where your mind is confused and has trouble distinguishing what is real from what is fantasy. You wake up relieved when you realize it was in fact a dream but this time, for the first time, the dream turns out to be the present reality.
The house is full of conversations with good friends, stories are being told and much needed laughs are heard every so often. As I’ve said before, there is no shortage of love in these moments and we stand a forever grateful family for that. Earlier this morning we had the burial service for my father so today is a day where we need as much support as possible and those around us have supplied and delivered in abundance. We had chosen not to have a traditional wake for my father in a funeral home but rather will be having a celebration of his life in a couple of week’s time here at my parents house. We want people to remember him with the memories that they shared with him. We are of the belief that he is in a better place now and that we need to celebrate the special person that he was.
One quick fact about him that I always liked was that he made my friends feel so at home, like they were part of the family, whenever they visited the house. He soon became their friends and it was such a typical scenario for my friends to be having their own conversations with him in the living room about life, art, anything and everything while I was in the kitchen with my mom or sisters. He was so engaging and I was always proud to introduce him to everyone and liked that much like me, he asked a million questions and really got to know them. You didn’t think this asking questions business was my idea, did you? lol! Nope, we have him to thank for my borderline maniacal obsession with question asking
I know tough days lie ahead but I am not alone and I know that. Laughter, tears, anger, relief and many more emotions are sure to come. Let’s take it one day at a time and things will be okay. I am off to take some aspirin since my head is hurting a bit right now but I wish you all a special evening and I will not tire of offering my thanks and gratitude for the love and support everyone has shown me during this time, it makes a difference I cannot express in words.
much eternal love
~adrian
I find solace in writing…
On September 23, 2008 in Thoughts in the evening...
I find solace in writing and therefore I write. It is with great sadness that I am announcing the passing of my father, Eduardo Jorge Fernandez. To write down all that he meant to me and all the emotions that surround my family and I right now would be virtually impossible so what I am doing is spending the next week dedicating my writings and energy in sharing the memories that will live on with us of who he was as a father, husband, friend, artist and man.
I am sorry to have to share this news with you on this September evening but it is who I am as a person to live my life with as much honesty and transparency as possible. If there is one lesson that I can share with you tonight that I have learned through my family is that investing love and compassion in the people around you is the best thing you can do with your time and energy. Everything else is of little value if you don’t have love around you, everything, and as flawed as we all are, we are all still worth investing in.
With that said, I thank you all for investing love into me and my family over the past few months and although I can’t hug you in person, know that I hold that sentiment in my heart for you. All your words, prayers and love have fallen on fertile soil and we, as a family could not ask for anything more.
Have a blessed night and with more conviction than ever I say to you, live your life to the fullest
much love and gratitude
~adrian
p.s. This is a pic of a Cape Cod Lighthouse. Cape Cod was one of my dad’s favorite places in the world.
Are you a spontaneous person?…
On September 22, 2008 in Thoughts in the evening...
So I sit here boogie-ing in my seat as I write these words. Yeah, that’s right, I can boogie. lol! The night is coming a little quicker each day and today we celebrate the leaving of summer and the beginning of fall. Well, maybe not celebrate but usher in might be better words to use. Actually I can use the word celebrate since I do love the Autumn, it’s just the winter that I can’t stand. So Autumn, I officially welcome you to 2008 and hope you give us some wonderfully charming days filled with good memories and even some romance thrown in there for good measure
Hope you had a productive day so far and a great beginning to the week. Things here at the Rhen household are moving along and although there is no specific update to tell you, we do still welcome all prayers and love so keep that coming by all means.
The night is sweet, the wind is null and the trees are still. This is the makings of a perfect night for a movie. I’ll see what’s on a little later and get some fun junk food ready to chow down whilst watching it. Yup, that sounds like a pretty darn good way to enjoy this night. And while we’re talking about enjoyment, I ask you this question tonight: Are you a spontaneous person? I guess the real question to answer if the response is ‘yes’ is when was the last time you were spontaneous? I consider myself to be a pretty spontaneous person but I am trying to think of the last spontaneous thing I did and I am having trouble. Hhhmm, I gotta keep thinking. lol!
Hope you have a spontaneously delightful night
much love
~adrian
